Taking Care of YOU
There are many facets to taking care of yourself. One of the most challenging aspects of our health is our mental health. Mental health is not something that is normally taught to children. We are told we need to exercise and eat healthily but how many times were we told how to handle our thoughts and mental health? Not many. We just go through life trying to navigate the countless thoughts and feelings we have, and most of the time we are hesitant to talk about them. Why do we do this? It’s ok to talk about what you are feeling and your mental health is nothing to be ashamed of. Recognizing, accepting and doing what YOU need to do to be happy and in a positive headspace, is part of taking care of your mental health. Taking care of YOU matters.
Social Media & Mental Health
Social media is a huge contributor to the state of one’s mental health. I (Jess) deleted my Facebook more than a year ago and it alleviated so much social anxiety. I developed a love/hate relationship with social media but always felt like I “had” to keep it in order to stay in touch with people, stay up to date and to even stay relevant. It sounds silly in hindsight, but its the truth. It was hard at first but as time passed, I started to live more in the present moment instead of mindlessly scrolling. Ask yourself, ” How many of these people on my timeline TRULY care about me?” Why do we feel such a strong need to comment and like people’s pictures like we haven’t seen or physically spoke within years or maybe ever? Just because you used to know someone, doesn’t mean you still do. If social media for any reason causes you anxiety, sadness or feelings of inadequacy- take a break from it. In my personal journey, I learned so much about myself once I disconnected from the toxicity of Facebook. I don’t know if I will ever go back to FB, but I’m happy and that’s all that matters to me right now. 
Key Reminders:
- Unfollow negative people or pages that make you feel down on yourself.
- Allow time to “disconnect” or take a social media detox and be in the present moment.
- Remember that not everything is as it appears online.
- You have no obligation to stay in touch with people who don’t stay in touch with you.
- “Likes” and the number of friends really means nothing at the end of the day. It’s quality over quantity, ALWAYS!
- If it does not bring you joy then do you really need it?
Recognizing How You Feel
We all live such busy and fast-paced lives that sometimes we forgot to slow down and just breathe. Taking the time to evaluate how you feel and gauge the status of your mental health is so important. This is called being mindful. We feel different every day and accepting that you will have bad days allows you to be proactive and manage them better. Notice when you are feeling emotions that interrupt your day in a negative aspect. Take the time to evaluate why you feel the way you do and what triggered it. Having these mindful pauses will help you evaluate your body. You are allowed to feel whatever it is that you feel. Nothing is wrong with you because your mental health is not 100% 24/7. No one is perfect and no one has the right to make you feel ashamed for feeling the way you do. Take notice of people who drain you of your energy. Pay attention to who is and isn’t there for you in a time of need. Recognize how you feel and what promotes a positive headspace. You are in control of your happiness and if you need to make a drastic change for the sake of your mental health and well being.. then do it and don’t worry about who might have something to say about it.
Key Reminders:
- Take time for yourself to do the things that make you happy.
- Remove toxic people and end toxic relationships (with friends, family, colleagues, etc).
- Remind yourself of all the things/people/experiences you are thankful for.
- Confide in someone that you trust and that won’t judge you. Find a positive outlet.
- Learn to be okay with being alone sometimes.
- Trust your gut feeling.
- Love yourself and let go of expectations and the need for acceptance from others.
Mindfulness
I (Ray) am required to be trained and teach Dynamic Mindfulness in the classroom to my students. We use these skills in order to teach them how to manage their stress, self-awareness, and self-regulation. The techniques are there for you to focus on your breathing as well as connecting your breath to movement and being in the moment. Dynamic Mindfulness has been proven to improve school and classroom climate as well as the well being and health of the students. All of these techniques and skills can be adapted to fit your everyday life and that is what we teach our students. The techniques we use can be done by anyone just about anywhere. We encourage them to use these skills whenever needed and hope they carry them into adulthood.
Take A Moment
Taking time for yourself and your mental health is not selfish. You are important! Taking time to be aware of the now, will help you realize what may be good for you and the things that are harmful to your mental health. Be mindful of your mental health and reach out to a professional for help. You never have to go through anything alone. Help is out there and we will happily lead you in the right place to better your mental health. We both have family members who suffer from depression, schizophrenia, bipolar and anxiety. We understand the havoc depression and anxiety can have on your life. You’re not alone – even if at times it might feel like it.
You are allowed to have bad days but you don’t have to go through them alone!
Please share how you deal with episodes of depression or what you have done/changed to better your mental health!
These are great tips! Working on being proactive by removing toxic people from your life can do amazing things for your mental health!
Removing toxic people has been a HUGE contributor to my overall happiness! Thank you so much for reading <3
I try to teach my kids mindfulness! I love that you mentioned instilling this in children. My parents didn’t do this for me and it’s something I believe very strongly. Teaching our children how to deal with their emotions instead of burying them!
That’s amazing Delaney!! Teaching them young how to deal with situations and understand that they are allowed to feel those things but talking about them is healthy! Thank you for reading!
I love everything about this post especially the part about social media!! Social Media will absolutely destroy your mental health if you let it. It’s important to know when to “log off”. For real. The internet isn’t a safe place for the heart. Great post and thanks so much for sharing !! ? https://jessierenea.com/abusive-relationships-letting-go-hurts-but-theres-no-healing-in-holding-on-either/
Agree with alll of that! Disconnecting is something I always take the time to do so I can recharge. It’s amazing the impacts it can have on your mental state & noticing when it’s affecting you in a negative way. Thank you so much for reading Jessica ❣️
Excellent tips and so true you do have to disconnect from social media.
You definitely do! It’s necessary! Thank you for reading ❣️
Thank you, Tamyara!
Walking away from toxic people always helps any mental state. I’ve had to do that on occasion myself. Having a awesome circle of friends or just a few best friends is great too. And social media, yes that is one of today’s most prominent killers to this generation. This was a well put blog, thanks for sharing.
I removed facebook for several years but then reactivated it. I find that what helps for me is turning off the notifications for social media on my phone so I don’t feel pressured to be “on” all the time. Social media is on my terms and I feel no guilt removing toxic people from it.
Somewhat ironically it was getting my Autism diagnosis last year that enabled me to finally remove some “friends” from my life that I think were pretty toxic, and certainly had no respect for my boundaries or personal space. For a long time I had been putting up with it because they kept on telling me that I was difficult and weird for not wanting them to be touching my arm all the time and I internalised that as a fault with me and my social communication, but once I got the diagnosis I think it justified in my mind that it was okay for me to not want to be touched and if other people didn’t like that and kept forcing it on me then that was their problem and not mine.
Thank you so much for sharing your story! I loved reading this! It is absolutely their problem and not yours! You know you better than anyone else!
I also have social media notifications turned off on my phone as well. It has helped tremendously with my anxiety.
Thank you for always being so open and talking with us! We love your interactions ❣️❣️
I’m barely even on Facebook now because of how toxic and negative it is and feel 10x better for it!
Bad social media and toxic people are two things no one needs in their lives.
Thank you for sharing with us, as always I loved reading through your post, you girls are doing such a fantastic job, keep it up❣
I 100% agree about Facebook! It’s been 2 years already since I deleted mine and I honestly don’t miss it one bit. I realized that I was spending way too much time reading about people’s lives, people who I haven’t spoken to in years! Getting rid of it was so worth it for my own wellbeing.
I also think that in order to know how to manage your mental health, you need to be at peace with yourself. Any time I feel some type of way about myself, I notice that it starts to affect parts in my life negatively, which in turn makes me feel even more blah about my life.
Mariam, that is so healthy! Peace with yourself is key. It all starts from within.
Thank you for sharing your journey with us! I hope you keep in touch. We would appreciate that.
This really resonates with me at the moment. I’ve also had a bit of a social media detox and it genuinely works wonders!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts :)x
This makes me want to get rid of more social media. I too, find myself spending way too much time scrolling on social media.
This is such a helpful post! I deleted Facebook and Snapchat a few years ago and I’ve not looked back since. I recommend it to anybody! Recently I’ve also started meditating and that’s been helping my mental health too!